I have lost track as to how many posts I have started and not completed over the past few months. I want to write, but I am having a hard time finishing anything and hitting that little blue “publish” button. I miss sitting at my computer and having words flow out of my brain and into my fingers. I miss the constant clicking of the keys and the glow of my screen (fair enough, I get my fill of computer screens, spreadsheets and clicks at work, but somehow that’s different 😉 ). I miss having something I feel is worth writing about. I would rather not write than write just for the sake of saying something I’m not sure is worth reading.
I have not stopped reading blogs and find myself disappointed when my favourites stop writing for a period of time. There is something intriguing about having a glimpse into others’ lives. Some blogs I have been reading so long I feel like I know the writer although I know they likely don’t realize I am reading. I wonder if I have followers that think the same? I have never been consistent with my blog so I think it might be presumptuous of me to think anyone misses me when I don’t post. But the truth is I miss me when I don’t post.
I have felt scattered lately in my writing. I start posts and then lose interest in what I have to say. I write about the mundane and attempt to make it interesting. I write about something that inspired me and then realize maybe it isn’t so. I write a few words, delete and write them again in hopes they will somehow convey something interesting. I might be disappointed in myself for not having anything worth writing about, but I still attempt to write and that’s something.
The truth of the matter is, maybe I just needed to stop for a while and think rather than write.